Sunday, February 19, 2017

The fault, dear Brutus


Dick's good friend, Mr.Sube Rozza, posts infrequently on his own Facebook page. Rozza lives in a remote corner of the far west on an estate called Casa Rozza.  He chairs a think tank of like minded fellows of both genders who call themselves  The Ponder Rozza. Here we have re posted his latest remarks for the benefit of those not privy to his page. His thoughts are not unlike those of this editorial board.

News of the election has just reached us here at Casa Rozza , and we are neither surprised nor dismayed by the outcome. Whereas the new president is clearly a self-regarding fool, his opponent, Mrs. Clinton, is a monster unworthy of elevation to office. Her voters were correct in preferring her to the vile Mr. Trump, but far better people than she were passed over. It seems to us that the American electorate is swayed by trivia and bored by significance. Mr. Obama was neither guiltless nor guileless, but his abilities swamped the critics until institutional racism overcame our better instincts and sent to congress those who represented our worst instincts. Some see this as a needed historical balancing, as if too much of a good thing were a bad thing. A moment's reflection negates this. We have had great leaders and bad, and the bad have all brought us to  near ruin, fiscally or martially. We now face the real possibility of the former two in combination, thanks to those of us who fell for Mr. Trump's septic sway. Do not look to the stars for salvation. Look to your shoes, and take steps to organize, proselytize, and sanitize.
    In response to  Facebook friend's  comment regarding any benefits one might derive from star gazing, I went on to say that I have the good fortune to live beneath a sky unpolluted by light caused by mankind. To call it "dark" is misleading, for it blazes with the light of trillions of stars. Most Americans are not given the pleasure and privilege of such majesty, and of those few who have it, even fewer are drawn to conclude that life abounds across infinite universes. Many still believe in a god so small that he created humans in his image and gave them a home alone, as it were. We at Ponder Rozza give much thought to such philosophic / scientific issues as these, but always find that new evidence opens new doors into insoluble problems of time and space. The "Big Bang" hypothesis may be of abstract interest to some, but it explains nothing of the infinity of time, for what in fact preceded it but multitudes of universes that collapsed and exploded? Brilliant minds have broken against such rocks of absurdity, and we are no closer to an understanding of who, what, when, where...and as to "Why?" There can be no Why, and that is what drives us to madness as we murder one another to establish doctrinal supremacy. And yet one continues to gaze upward, fingers crossed.

Sunday, January 22, 2017

JUST FOR YOU

A maggot on the right wing's
rotting corpse
laid by flies that ate
from dog turds
in the park?
An orange peel dropped
as garbage trucks
chugged off
to drop their loads
in city dumps?
The world will hold its breath
while Donald Trump cavorts
beneath the hugest flag
that ever flew,
and don't forget,
he does it just for you.

Monday, January 09, 2017

DODO DADA DISS!

Late breaking news from The Dick Times: News That Bites! Meryl Streep lifts Golden Globe carpet and finds a rat's nest of PET hair! "Disabled" diss prompts twitter hiss from Trump, whose stump speech reached millions of shallow minds! Dick finds nada to like in Dada tweets, sez PET really eats! ("Bites" won't rhyme, darn it.)

Wednesday, December 28, 2016

ODE TO SORROW

O, what tweet from the dodo's beak will we behold upon the sun's rise?
A catalogue of ruses drawn from shifting sands, each grain containing nought but well aimed lies, deceptions and untruths which break in muddy foam upon the nation's shrinking shore.
Sleep soundly, dear Columbia, and dream true visions, should this grim beast create such havoc that you dream no more.

Saturday, December 03, 2016

LOW INTEREST LOANS

Live from the armchair! It's The Dick Times: News that Bites !!Wars are good for business. Every sector of the economy spikes. Heavy industry requires new factory workers, and production is necessarily domestic. Technology leaps forward under government contracts, and new inventions , devised to make war, often find peaceful uses with a few tweaks. Young patriots leave parental basements to enlist,and unemployment falls. Medicine devises great new ways to serve the horribly wounded, and this technology can be offered to civilians, at a price. Political seats are stabile, continuity and experience being more important than usual. Financial markets enjoy happier days of solid and continuing prosperity as investors jump in for a slice of the pie. Construction, real estate, and agriculture all benefit. Flag burning loses its appeal, and Wikileaks is universally despised. A chief executive with corporate ties would profit immensely, as would all those close to him. Congress would be loathe to examine his activities or look for tax records, should that ever have occurred to any there to do so. The media, which put him in office through a lifetime of fawning, would buckle, bow, and click its heels, jawohling loudly lest it not be heard. Our CEO in waiting might now be warming his smallish hands over ashtrays of ashes, remnants of warnings and admonishments from the timid left. His Christmas will arrive on January 20. Dick sez: don't buy war bonds from Donald Trump. His record of repayment shows a lack of concern with lenders. After all, once he has the money there's no reason to give it back. That's for losers.

Wednesday, November 02, 2016

A Hoover legacy

The Dick Times: News That Bites! Eighty years of moral corruption has led the FBI to this dangerous crossroads. The Bureau now serves as the Republican Praetorian Guard, commissioned by Congress to hand the election to Donald Trump. No other rational explanation can be given for the Director's recent action. Was he promised the moon? In a Trump universe it's made of green cheese. Dick sez: filled with D-con.

Saturday, October 08, 2016

Heave Ho!

LIVE FROM CHICAGO! IT'S THE DICK TIMES: NEWS THAT BITES!! From the city desk, news of Donald Trump's heartfelt teleprompter apology! Mr. Peanut carefully reads remarks written by aides afraid of losing jobs next Monday, one day after Clinton crushes sexist beast in debate! Trump drags freight train of bad taste while chasing oval office chair! "Not fair", he says of vast blanket of tv shots which will put approval in the aughts! Dick sez: I gots to hurl, man.

PUSSY RIOT!!

URGENT POLITICAL UPDATE! FROM THE DESK OF THE DICK TMES: NEWS THAT BITES!! Dateline Chicago 7 September! Trump chumps Pence! Freaks out Jesus lovers with knotty words that may tie up election for Clinton! Pussy riot on web points fingers at tiny groping hand and Mr. Peanut stays quiet! Dick sez: we don't buy it.